Counting red cars
Ugh. It's been more than two months since Lillian and I broke up, but every time I see a red car, the memories come hurdling back. Is it her, in the car? Is there someone with her? What would I do if I actually saw her? Would I be strong enough to say nothing, or would I greet her with open arms?
I know now, logically, that she and I are not right together. I don't want her back in my life. But as the pain slowly slips away, it's replaced by longing. I have never loved anyone the way I've loved her. So while logically, I know it's good to be apart, I miss her terribly.
The lesson here, of course, is to never date a girl who owns a red car. There's just too many red cars out there, too many hatchbacks.
Besides my Pavlovian response to los caros rojo, life is pretty good. I went to the Monday west coast dance at Agate Hall and had a great time. Met tons of new people and found a new friend, a girl named Jamie. After the dance, Will, Katy, Jamie and I went over to Will's pad and played a game of hearts. I play a pretty wretched hearts game ... it's a good thing I play poker for money and not hearts.
I'm still doing my best to get in daily devotionals with God. I feel so much better after I've had quiet time each day but it's amazing what I'll do to try and get out of it and put it off. It's often the highlight of my day, but everything else seems to take priority. Odd how that works.
The photo up above is of Jack and Sienna, Grace's dog. G gets back from Hawaii this week, which means the dogs will get to hang out again soon. Yay!
posted by -Brook at 11:31 AM
12 Comments:
Yay! I'm glad you're following up on this posting more often idea. But I can't be entirely nice in this comment...I must nit-pick at your Spanish: los caros rojo should be los carros rojos, but you know that. :)
I've never commented on your posts before, but I do enjoy reading them when I get around to it. As someone who is in a situation very similar to yours, I can totally sympathize. I, too, have found that daily quiet time to focus on God really helps, but it is hard to keep it a top priority. I always feel peaceful, like everything is going to be just fine, when I devote time to God regulary. You'd think that'd keep me focused! But for some reason I end up back in the same old rut of worry and longing. Anyways, good luck with everything!
OK anonymous, so, who are you? My top 3 guesses are Jeff, Josh or Andy. E-mail me at breinhard@gmail.com, I'd be interested in discussing things further with you.
Still with the poker, huh? Well, at least you're not taking my money anymore. Glad you're updating!
Oh, and I've got roughly the same problem; my ex drives a silver Camry. In California, you pretty much can't throw a rock without hitting a silver Camry.
I would seriously pony up $500 whenever I'd broken it off with a LTR > 1 year to pay for the car to get a new paint job. I don't care what color, I just don't want to know. While you're at it, rummage through the junkyard and change the Ford logo to a Honda or maybe an Acura ... then once again I'll be blissfully ignorant of the 4-wheeled heartache out there. Dev, do you have your own blog again or are you blogless?
I am going blogless.
nice to hear from you Brook. oh man I so know what you mean about the car thing...every time I see a Ford Focus I still think of Eddie.
I'm glad you're doing more "God stuff". I need to as well.
we're back...call re: dog snorkeling.
For me, it's every time I see a battered aging yellow truck. It's surprising how many there are around.
Brook! You can't brag on Will's blog about posting more often than him if you don't actually post more often...
BROOK, hit me up on AOL IM, ryno1435
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